Sex or sexual issues are usually symptoms of other problems within the relationship. When these are resolved, most couples realized it was never about sex.
The following checklist highlights a few of the common relationship issues that I have experienced / addressed throughout my 23+ years of practice dealing with couples. This is not limited to TCI, but includes my Country, St. Kitts & Nevis, as well as other Caribbean Countries, and the United States of America where I studies and trained. This is not an exhaustive list; and these so-called sexual issues are often not about sex or sexual activities, but are signs and symptoms of other fundamental issues that are ignored:
1. Boundary Issues – most spouses want to change their partners, and can’t; thus, there are holdouts on sexual activities as a way to pressure that change, which often never comes. Instead, it puts more strain on the relationship and on sexual activity.
2. Decreased or Lack of Intimacy – as a result of couples not being able to spend the quality time and communicating as openly and positively as before, when they first met; desire for and affection towards each other decline. This often leaves both partners, or at least one partner unsatisfied; and sexual activity becomes more of a chore than a cloud of bliss.
3. Distracted Attention – couples usually bring children into the mix. Children are a blessing; but couples have a tendency to allow children to distract their love, romance, and intimacy. Couples don’t date anymore, don’t have their sexual cat-plays anymore, they don’t dress sexily in the bedroom anymore… when asked why? The usual response, “the Children.” Of course, this hinders getting to the home base (Sex!!!).
4. Emotional Cheating – because of all of the above previously highlighted issues, couples usual turn to a friend or a online buddy or a neighbor to confide in. This becomes a habitual activity. And, before you know it, it has gone too far. In most cases, there are no physical sexual interactions. However, the partner becomes so caught up in the emotional relationship that it distracts from the actual “real” relationship. Not finding a way to effectively communicate their needs and the relational hiccups, couples cause the door to the bedroom to be temporary closed.
5. Lack of Appreciation – can trigger infidelity or emotional cheating. When a partner does not feel appreciated, s/he often turn to others for such attention. More often than not does “it” stays as verbal compliments. Left attended, it crosses over to the other side… where sexual activity looks brighter.
6. Lack of Effective Communication – instead of couples communicate with each other, they talk at each other, complain to each other, and criticize one another as a means to communicate. What this does is turn off the switch to the activities in bedroom, starting with a decline in intimacy and foreplaying.
7. Money – The Mighty King Sparrow (Calypsonian) sings, “No Money, No Love.” Couples are often not openly honest with each other about the finances. In many relationships, couples don’t budget; and the financial resources become depleted. The bills are yet to paid, but one partner has a new set of leather car seats or the other partner gets her ballroom-style gown, nails done, hair style off the chain for the upcoming event… Either way, neither partner previously discussed their spending; and thus, this turns into a verbal fight of yelling and name calling, resulting into resentment lasting for weeks up to months. When this happens, you know the bedroom door is closed for business… No Money, No Love!
8. Poor Time Management – due to the stressful demands of work and hours spent on community volunteering activities, couples become so busy and distressed that the quality of their marital relationship decline, starting with the lack of spending quality time with each other. Therefore, the teasing and cat-playing that usual precedes awesome sexual activities are stopped; thus, killing the “big bang” feeling during sexual activities.
9. Technological Interference and Distraction – with technology comes responsibility. Many couples text at dinner, at family meetings, in the bedroom – when they should be touching and gently caressing each other. Having the laptop in bed all the time next to your partner, doe not equal “Quality Time.” Many couples are on Facebook, when they should be kissing their partners faces. Many are on Twitter, when they should be tweeting the words of love in their partners ears. When this happens, partners will be turned off; thus, shutting the lid to the cookie jar.
10. Unwillingness to Forgive – “I can forgive, but I can’t forget” … is usually what is said when asked about forgiving the past and moving on for the better. Many couples are NOT willing to forgive; … they are able to forgive, but more often, they are NOT willing to forgive. When this happens, resentment usually dominates and many partners resort to sleeping in the children’s or other bedroom or on the sofa / couch to avoid intimacy or sexual interactions with their significant other.
Bahamas Ministry of Tourism, Investments & Aviation Celebrates World Tourism Day
#TheBahamas, September 28, 2021 – “This year, World Tourism Day has been designated as a day to focus on inclusive growth through tourism, which is quite poignant,” said Deputy Prime Minister The Honourable I. Chester Cooper, Bahamas Minister of Tourism, Investments & Aviation. “Like many Caribbean destinations, tourism is the heartbeat of The Bahamas and as we say, it is everyone’s business. Our beaches are breathtaking, and the water is so clear you can see it from space, but that is not what defines us. Rather, it is every individual person who shapes the Bahamas experience and stands to benefit from tourism’s success. I am committed to creating jobs and opportunities for all Bahamians and to help our great nation heal.”
As international travel restrictions begin to ease, spurred by an increase in vaccine accessibility, The Bahamas is well positioned for continued recovery. A rise in scheduled airlift combined with the return of the cruise industry is contributing to a positive increase in visitor numbers, leading to nearly 500,000 visitors over the first six months of the year.
“While we have faced an uphill battle during these unprecedented times, we must stay focused and optimistic as the world begins to reopen,” noted the Deputy Prime Minister. “I join with leaders throughout the Caribbean to elevate the importance of social inclusion, sustainability and smart destinations and businesses. Our beautiful country, and our beloved Caribbean region, will prosper again and continue to progress, as in the words of the motto of The Bahamas: Forward, Upward, Onward, Together.”
Photo Credit: Sandals.com
Lyford Cay Foundations Award Academic Scholarships to 18 Bahamians
#TheBahamas, September 27, 2021 – Eighteen Bahamians who are committed to making a difference in The Bahamas in fields ranging from mitigating climate change to ending physical abuse have been awarded generous undergraduate and graduate school scholarships from the Lyford Cay Foundations.
Today’s announcement of the names of academic awardees follows earlier news that for the first time in its 50+ year history, the Foundations saw the majority of successful applicants for vocational scholarships chose training and certification in medical or health-related subjects – perhaps inspired by the great health care needs as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic.
“Both groups, academic and technical vocational, were outstanding this year, making the work of the independent screening committees more challenging than ever and many of the students who applied were so impressive that they were also being offered substantial scholarships from top universities, all of which speaks for the quality and reputation of students from The Bahamas,” said Dr. Nicola Virgill-Rolle, Executive Director. “What was of particular interest this year is the common thread in their essays, almost like a fire burning in them – a desire to make a difference in The Bahamas when they return.”
One of those recipients, Empress Sears, a graduate of Sunland Baptist Academy in Grand Bahama, is off to study Ecology and Evolutionary Biology at the University of Toronto with a William Birchall Scholarship. “An issue we as Bahamians should all be concerned about is the lack of attention given to our natural resources,” Sears wrote in her essay. “Our beaches, mangroves, pine forests, and coral reefs are in a state of peril….Overproduction of air pollutants has caused the temperature to steadily climb worldwide. The results of this come in the form of sweltering heat and devastating hurricanes. These effects play a major role in why our natural resources are under extreme stress. It is our duty as Bahamians to seek out the best possible methods to reduce the severity of these natural disasters.”
Two other recipients, Jasmine Adamson and Paul Roberts, plan to tackle the energy problem, focusing on renewables, Roberts at University of California, Berkley, and Adamson at Kettering University.
Another, Rhodricia Francis, was inspired by her own family’s experience to become a pharmaceutical chemist. “I believe that Bahamians deserve access to better treatments and medications,” she wrote. “As a pharmaceutical chemist, I will develop novel, effective drugs with minimal side effects and investigate more efficient methods to synthesize current drugs. Efficiency in drug creation will make medication more accessible to the general population.”
Lyford Cay Foundation Chairman Basil Goulandris cited the variety of interests and ambition as “extraordinary.”
“Every year, we think how can next year’s applicants equal this year’s and every year, new applicants surprise us,” he said. “This year, the applicants showed interest in a wide variety of subjects that were very demanding and an extraordinary ambition to make The Bahamas even better.”
Canadian Lyford Cay Foundation Chairman Tim Unwin agreed.
“When you look at the fields of study and the quality of the scholarship recipients for 2021-22, you have to feel that the future of The Bahamas is in good hands,” Unwin declared. “Upon their return to The Bahamas, these wonderful students will find many opportunities to give effect to their vision.”
The Foundations awarded $380,000 in scholarships this year to 26 new recipients in addition to the 27 ongoing scholarships allowing Bahamians to study throughout the US, Canada and the UK. The Foundations have awarded more than $50 million in education benefits to Bahamians along with helping to support non-profits, with an emphasis on those that contribute to education.
Recipients of this year’s new undergraduate scholarships include Paul Roberts – Physics at the University of California, Berkeley; Jasmine Adamson – Mechanical Engineering, Kettering University; Zion Virgil – Chemistry, Florida Southern College; Rhodricia Francis – Chemistry, Florida International University; Jaleah Taylor – Visual Arts/Communications, Media and Film, University of Windsor; Kiara Minnis – Computer Science Degree with Cooperative Education, Lakehead University; Ashanti Marshall – English and Art, St. Francis Xaviers; Shealyn Burrows – Chemistry, St. Mary’s University; Tyler Christie – Biology, St. Mary’s University; Dacacia Russell – Accounting, Mount Royal University; Chandler Darville – Mechanical Engineering, University of Toronto; Alexander Baxter – Management, University of Toronto; Asya Johnson – Computer Science, University of New Brunswick; Empress Sears – Ecology & Evolutionary Biology, University of Toronto.
Those working toward graduate degrees include : Leandria Albury – Public Health Administration and Policy, University of Minnesota; Felecia Campbell – Child and Youth Care, Holland College; Lemuel Johnson – Trumpet Performance, Western Illinois University; and Clarence Albury – Creative Writing, Witchita State University.
Turks and Caicos Islands Tourist Board Celebrates World Tourism Day
The Destination Continues to See an Influx of Tourists, Following One of the Busiest Summers on Record, and Is Optimistic for the Future
#TurksandCaicos, September 27, 2021 – The Turks and Caicos Islands Tourist Board, the exclusive tourism authority for the Turks and Caicos Islands, is excited to celebrate World Tourism Day on today, September 27, 2021, and reflect on the Island’s significant increase in tourism since the pandemic. Thanks to the Tourist Board’s strategic marketing and public relations plans, combined with its vigilant TCI Assured protocols, aggressive vaccine campaign, and pent-up travel demand, the destination reported one of its busiest summers to date in 2021 with an increase of over 18% in June, 19% in July, and 15% in August compared to pre-pandemic statistics in 2019.
“On World Tourism Day and every day, we are proud to celebrate the success of tourism to the Turks and Caicos Islands, especially after the challenges that we and all tourism-driven countries faced during the pandemic,” said Pamela Ewing, Director of Tourism for the Turks and Caicos Islands Tourist Board. “We have worked hard to enforce necessary safety protocols to ensure that tourism, our main economic driver, continues to positively impact both our local and travelling communities. The destination is optimistic for one of the busiest Festive seasons to date ahead, and we wish success to all other islands in the Caribbean.”
Tourism in the Turks and Caicos Islands continues to flourish due to the Tourist Board’s strategic marketing and public relations campaigns in the United States, Canada, South America, United Kingdom and Europe to promote the destination as safe for travelers. This includes press trips with key publications, radio campaigns in source markets, advertising and partnerships with stakeholders, and executing the signature event, Turks and Caicos Conference (TACC), which updated all partners on protocols and accommodation availability.
“We are grateful for all of our valued tourism partners, who have supported our efforts to ensure the ongoing safety of our residents and guests, and to the community for their vigilance in getting vaccinated and adhering to protocols,” said Honorable Josephine Connolly, Minister of Tourism for the Turks and Caicos Islands. “It is because of everyone’s commitment that we’ve been able to keep tourism thriving safely and allow guests to focus on enjoying the exceptional vacation experience afforded by the destination, our picturesque beaches, and our world-class resorts and villas.”
Travel confidence has also increased thanks to the destination’s TCI Assured portal, a quality assurance pre-travel program and portal, which requires require a negative COVID-19 RT-PCR, NAA, RNA or Antigen test result from a test taken within three days of travel, medical / travel insurance that covers medevac, a completed health screening questionnaire, and proof of vaccination for all visitors ages 16 years and over. The vaccine requirement underscores the destination’s commitment to health and safety and expands on its already vigilant travel protocols, which have been in place for travelers since July 22, 2020, when the destination opened its borders to tourists. The Turks and Caicos Islands also continues to promote its vaccine campaign among residents, with over 70 percent of the adult population being fully vaccinated with the Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine—making it one of the most inoculated countries in the world.
For more information on the Turks and Caicos Islands, call 1 (800) 241-0824 or visit www.turksandcaicostourism.com. Follow the Turks and Caicos Islands on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.
FIND US ON FACEBOOK
Bahamas News7 days ago
Over 68,000 STAYED HOME in Bahamas Elections; We have BEST and WORST for Voter Participation
News7 days ago
Vaccine Requirement for International Travelers
News7 days ago
Canadians Fly South to Turks & Caicos!
News7 days ago
Grandstanding at best – Hon. Jameka Williams
Caribbean News7 days ago
JAMAICA: Ardenne High School Wins Another Marcus Garvey Award For Excellence
News7 days ago
COVID Works programme launched by Ministry of Physical Planning & Infrastructure Development
Caribbean News4 days ago
ScotiaBank Turks & Caicos Awarded Best Consumer Digital Bank 2021
Bahamas News1 week ago
Prime Minister Hon. Philip Davis pledges to govern in the interests of all Bahamians